'MAKING SENSE' IS HOW OUR UNIVERSE WORKS, because it has to.

Making sense is a necessity of life. It's how our universe works. Why do we say, "Things happen for a reason"?  Because they have to. The things that make up our universe don't operate independently of one another. Everything and everyone is connected, continually producing a cause and effect...all the while wearing away our rough edges, like sea glass.  It's an evolutionary process.

Making sense is the fundamental meaning, direction, and balance of life that keeps the stars in the sky and our universe moving forward.  That's not to say that things can't get confoundedly confusing and chaotic at times, but there's a purpose to it all and lessons to be learned. Just as hurricanes clean out the mangroves, and floods feed the soil, seeming 'disasters' should be embraced as the necessities of life and opportunities for improvement that they truly are.

Many people, particularly those who've had a NDE (Near Death Experience), say that God's divine spirit of 'unconditional love' is at the core of everything. And I agree. Yet, what else is God's unconditional love, but a caring concern and respect for all things, including yourself, in a manner that 'makes sense'? Some people could confuse crazy 'blind love' with unconditional love, but they are not the same thing. One makes sense, and the other doesn't. So, for the purposes of My "Make Sense" Journal, I focus on 'making sense', with unconditional but 'sensical' love, as a given. (That's as clear as mud and perhaps not a great beginning for my journal, but I'm sticking with it for now.)

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HOW TO MAKE SENSE? Open your mind, consider all the possibilities, and keep things as simple as possible.

Learn from everything - the good and bad, the large and small, the night and day. Everything has something to offer, something to teach us, including our gut instincts.  That said, we should also try to keep things as simple as possible, in order to avoid unnecessary chaos. And don't let aspirations toward perfection... be the enemy of what is realistically possible.

Duality is everywhere, so beware of false choices. In many, if not most cases, each choice has its pros and cons. So, there may be no completely correct answer for any single question.  Instead, we should allow for the use of two or more opposing solutions for simple and complex issues alike, such as... the benefits of both: public & private education, free health care & private options, capitalism & socialism, primitive skills & high technology, bartering & money, rock & classical music, Democrats & Republicans, etc.. 

Some decisions can be very be difficult in the extreme - necessary, but also tragic. Congress deals with those decisions all the time, making sometimes painful concessions in order to pass bills for the greater good. A classic historic example concerns America's Founding Fathers, who agreed to continue slavery in order to gain the support of the Southern colonies to break from Great Britain and win our independence. The saving grace was that their stated 'good intention' of 'democracy for all' eventually came to fruition. And that is common; that good decisions can take a long time to become reality. And then they need to be constantly defended.

Here are some practical steps to making sense on any subject:

• Observe
• Analyze
• Use logic
• Experiment
• Do research
• Work with others
• Verify, don't trust
• Question everything
• Honor your instincts
• Make up your own mind
• But always keep an open mind

Discussing & Defending Your Decisions:  Try to engage respectfully in any defense or debate about your decisions. Treat it more like a discussion instead, acknowledge the pros and cons of the subject at hand.  Always keep an open mind, which includes a willingness to change your mind if circumstances dictate. Your respectful and open attitude will make any discussion or debate a more rewarding experience for all concerned. 

THE DOCTRINE OF RISK MANAGEMENT: Diversify!  Spread Risk, Don't Concentrate It

As the saying goes, "Don't put all of your eggs in one basket."  Always have a Plan B and C, if necessary.  It's a basic principle of risk management and of life... spread risk out, don't concentrate it. This is why mass medication, such as vaccines, are a really bad idea, as they can act as a Trojan Horse for anyone who wants to harm large numbers of people.  It is also why we have a government with checks and balances (sort of); why the U.S. Congress passed anti-trust legislation (although not well enforced); and why an unelected One World Government with enforcement powers is a really bad idea (i.e., The Word Health Organization). It's why the power grid and other public utilities should be government-owned and locally operated (which many are not anymore), so that if there is a disaster, natural or manmade, large swaths of the country will not be without power, water, etc..  That's why "self-reliance" on a personal, local, regional, and national basis - knowing how to live with our wild world and do lots of things yourself - is essential to any real security.  And that's also why you shouldn't obsess over things like sports, endlessly redecorating your house, or relentlessly taking photos of yourself.  What if it all goes up in flames? Then what?  Instead, keep your interests diverse and use your time wisely on truly deserving projects that will, in the long run, benefit both yourself and society.

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PHILOSOPHY: The Family of Life. Everything's Connected, So Everything Gets Respected

We're all in this 'Family of Life' together and need to work together for the benefit of all. And that's because, at life's most basic elements, everything is connected. Trite, but true. Everyone and everything are made up of energy and vibration. There is no real separation. What affects one, affects us all.  Which is why we should respect everyone and everything.  It doesn't mean that we have to like it, but it does mean that we should try to 'understand' other people, things, and situations as much as possible... and then act in everyone's best interests. 

In other words, we should live our lives for the ‘common good’, not the ‘favored few’.  That is not an endorsement of communism or a criticism of capitalism, but instead a recognition that although strong leaders and competition are necessary for our evolution into a better world, we also don't want to leave others behind unnecessarily. That said, we should avoid mindless compassion. Enabling people to do things that are not in anyone's best interests (such as drug addiction) is not compassionate. It's destructive to both the individual concerned and society at large.

There will be times when we must make demands of each other, give way to righteous anger, defend ourselves against attack, and even imprison those who have gone seriously astray. But our demands must be just, our anger should be followed by sensible solutions, our defense should be in proportion to the attack, and prisons should focus on rehabilitation, not punishment.  It's also good to keep in mind that we are not all born with identical capabilities, which initially sounds unfortunate, if not unfair. But, it's that diversity of talents that helps humanity to survive and thrive (i.e., The Doctrine of Risk Management). 

Humanity needs a meaningful philosophy to serve as our foundation in life. So what makes better sense than, The Family of Life - Everything's Connected So Everything Gets Respected?

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CHARACTER & ATTITUDE:  Set good intentions, high goals, a 'can-do' attitude, realistic expectations, great work ethic, & sense of humor

We are all living through the “School Of Life” with endless lessons to teach us all - so patience and persistence are required. And what should our goals be?  We should strive to create an 'environment of excellence', not a 'culture of complacency'.  Set high goals and good intentions, like 'World Peace' and building a 'Paradise on Earth' for everyone's benefit, but do so with a balanced approach to life. Pace yourself - make time for work, play, and rest.  And manage your expectations.

Be realistic. If you think that life was meant to be "a bowl full of cherries", or fall into a rut that "the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence", then you're bound to be disappointed. Life is meant to be challenging as well as charming. If you put in the work, then you can expect incremental improvements and temporary setbacks - two steps forward, one step back. Life is not linear. Take comfort in that knowledge, so the next time something supposedly 'goes wrong', you won't think if it as a 'bad thing', but instead you'll embrace it as yet another lesson, another 'character-building opportunity' that you can learn from, so that you can continue to improve both yourself and your community. And

A "positive attitude" is a powerful force that can help you on your way, but don't let it blind you to life's realities. Understand that, in general, good things will not happen without an honest effort and hard work on your part. To meet life's challenges, we should aim to be 'universal' beings, embodying a diversity of knowledge and experiences, skilled to perform as many tasks as possible, prepared to face both victories and defeats, but not forgetting to have fun in the process.  Our goal is for an exciting and exhilarating life, full of charms and challenges, victories and defeats, all of which will, in the fullness of time, improve life for everyone. We absolutely can have more vibrant cities, beautiful towns, and a lovely countryside filled with happy and industrious people. We simply need to set our sights on those goals, figure out how best to achieve them, and then take the necessary steps to get where we want to go. 

What's the basic difference between character and attitude, which are so closely interrelated? Here's my definition: Our character is the core reason why we behave the way we do, and our attitude is how we behave. So, we can have a good set of beliefs and morals, but don't follow through with our actions. For example, lots of people spend an inordinate amount of time yelling at the TV over the politics of the day, but never get out of their chair to do something about it. Some people call them "armchair patriots".  Thomas Paine elaborated in 1776, “THESE are the times that try men's souls. The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of their country; but he that stands by it now, deserves the love and thanks of man and woman. Tyranny, like hell, is not easily conquered; yet we have this consolation with us, that the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly: it is dearness only that gives every thing its value. Heaven knows how to put a proper price upon its goods; and it would be strange indeed if so celestial an article as FREEDOM should not be highly rated.” https://www.battlefields.org/learn/articles/summer-soldiers-and-sunshine-patriots-american-crisis

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BELIEF & THE POWER OF PRAYER:  Believe in higher powers and happy endings...eventually

It makes sense to believe in a loving and benevolent higher power, supernatural forces, and our loved ones who have passed on,  who we can talk with, pray to, and ask for help. It's relieving to think that they are here watching over us and guiding us to do the right thing.  It consoling to believe that everything happens for a reason, that there are no coincidences in life, and that ‘all will be well’ in the end... although perhaps not in this life, but eventually. Yes, I believe in reincarnation, and that every life we lead is another step toward becoming a more perfect person in an ever-improving world. I also believe that God sees everything that we do, and that we go through a life review after we've passed. And that knowledge should serve as a strong incentive to do the right thing in our current lives.

It's comforting to believe in these things, even if we can’t prove it... and even if it isn’t true.  Why?  Consider the alternative - that there is no divine power to help us through this one life - that we're all alone in this world without any spiritual force to turn to.  Now that’s depressing and disabling! Physically and emotionally.  It paralyzes people into believing that they are helpless and hopeless.  And who would want that?  Which is why we need to believe in higher powers, even if they don't exist. 

Perceptions can become reality, for good and ill, at least of awhile. In fact, doctors and healers have known for centuries of the power of belief to heal the sick through the use of rituals and placebos (i.e., sugar pills).  And, the opposite is also true. Negative beliefs can destroy and kill. Which is why it's a good idea to stay positive, but with our eyes wide open (i.e., not naive). Buddha said: 'We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.'  Not sure I totally agree with that, because 'reality' has a way of winning out in the end, even over the most carefully constructed brain washing schemes by the dark side. However, Buddha has a point. Lots of damage can occur (and centuries can sometimes pass) before most people wake up to what's really going on.

All that said, there is overwhelming evidence of a universal consciousness, of other dimensions to life, and of a higher divine power (God) who offers us all limitless help, love, and joy. I sincerely believe that. I strongly believe in the power of prayer, asking for help, giving thanks, and talking to God and the universe, which I do throughout the day. Just thinking positive thoughts can send powerful messages out into the universe for others to receive.  At the end of the day, it just feels better to empower yourself through good intentions, strong beliefs, and hard work. It really helps us all better manage life's ups and downs. And that makes sense to me. 

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 ORGANIZED RELIGION: Pros and Cons

Organized religions have a vital role to play in our lives. Yet, many religions focus only on the spiritual side of life, not recognizing that it is really inseparable from our daily life and politics. Making matters worse, a religious institution's nonprofit tax status often discourages, if not prevents, them from taking a stand on political issues that can profoundly affect peoples' daily lives in both literal and spiritual ways. They need to change that, by either dropping their nonprofit status or getting legislation passed to grant them complete free speech rights. That said, this is not an endorsement of imposing religion on the public, particularly through legislation and the public school system.

Organized religions can feed your soul, create a strong social network, and help a community in many significant ways. However, religions can also divide us into teams, pit us against each another unnecessarily, or become cults. Organized religions can also seriously distract people from their civic duty and encourage people to be more concerned with their own spiritual needs, rather than the public good. Going to church can make many people feel good about themselves, without doing much good for society. And some religions are just plain weird, requiring their members to wear their hair a certain way, or shave their heads, or dress in a uniform of sorts, that has no relationship to what makes sense, except to control others and not allow their members to express themselves. If you are a member of an organized religion, it is important that you not be a mindless follower.  Keep your eyes open and your mind curious. 

As to those of us who do not belong to a religious institution, yet think of ourselves as spiritual people and believe in a divine power, our decisions not to join comes with its own downside, including a loss of community. Very frankly, it might have helped my husband and I raise our children. They lost out in being a part of something special. And I may yet join a church in the future. And, if you want to join a religious group, but can't find the right one, then think about starting one of your own. Just don't register as a nonprofit, so that you can say what's really on your mind, in your heart, and good for your soul.

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LOYALTY, PATRIOTISM, & PRIDE: Keep it all in perspective

We can be proud of our country, state, town, political party, our family, friends, ethnicity,  religion, school, college, employer, sport teams, and even ourselves, but let's not let pride, loyalty, or patriotism blind us to reality or convince us to do the wrong thing. That attitude can corrupt our character, distort our thinking, and lead us into making poor decisions.  Celebrate accomplishments and acknowledge faults. Stand firmly for what you believe in, do the right thing, try to coax others to your point of view, but always keep an open mind.  And please don't make enemies unnecessarily. Your foe in one conflict... could be your ally in another.  Remember, we're all part of the Family of Life, so let's keep our pride, loyalty, and patriotism in perspective!
 

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MANNERS MATTER because they do  See: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Etiquette

We should all remember to "mind our manners" because life is all about living in a respectful manner in all things (behavior, fashion, the arts, sports, politics, business, etc.). We're living through a time when many people, young and old, despite having some great ideas and proven skills, have demonstrated a serious lack of manners. These people need to wise up. They are unnecessarily hurting others and themselves. In many ways, diplomacy between nations is all about manners, aka The Golden Rule, treating others as they would like to be treated - with respect and fairness. So, let's apply diplomacy to our daily lives and keep in mind that we all lead by the examples we set. 

Here are some simple tips:

• Be mindful
• Respect others
• Help those in need
• Clean up after yourself
• Apologize when it's your fault
• Be a good sport, not a sore loser
• Say please, thank you, & you're welcome
• Congratulate others on their accomplishments
• Be a good conversationalist & a better listener

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GOVERNMENT - It's about Transparency, Honesty, Fairness, & Accountability.
 
THE SUNSHINE ACT & GOVERNMENT PUBLIC MEETINGS:  Don't let government officials replace official public meetings with "community outreach" meetings that are not official.  Know your rights: 1) Government legislative bodies, committees, and executive departments should have regularly scheduled (at least monthly) public meetings where the public can publicly comment.  2) The public should be able to publicly comment on any issue of public concern over which that government body has control, 3)  The usual time limit for public comments is 3 minutes. 4) All topics, resolutions, and legislation should be on the agenda at least three days before meetings, except in the case of true emergencies.  Read my attorneys' letter to Philadelphia City Council regarding their Sunshine Act violations (Mar 13, 2024) For more details, visit ProtocolsForDemocracy & Government Corruption For good government, we all must exercise our right to "meaningful and effective" free speech, a fair press, and verifiable elections, per The First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution and The Sunshine Act.

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'FREE SPEECH':   Let's keep what we mean by "free speech" as simple as possible, although it can get complicated. It is illegal to say certain things in a certain way: https://www.uscourts.gov/about-federal-courts/educational-resources/about-educational-outreach/activity-resources/what-does-free-speech-mean  That said, free speech has always been under attack by those who don't agree with what others have to say... by claiming that it is hate speech, disinformation, and misinformation... regardless of the facts.

It should be unconstitutional to ban people from social media, public events, financial institutions, stores, events, etc. that constitute the "public square", just because those in control don't agree with what others have to say... as happened to many conservative and anti-COVID-mandate activists (including myself) during the Biden Administration.

Moreover, government should help promote 'free speech' by publishing "comment sections" that the public can view on the home pages of public officials and government departments. They can provide one comment section for those who want to go "on the record", plus an anonymous comment section. In addition, every neighborhood should have a physical bulletin board (or telephone pole) that the public could use, so that the public is not entirely reliant on electronic communications.

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A FREE & FAIR PRESS: A fair press reports on all sides of any issue and gives all sides equal coverage through its reporting and opinion pages. Of course, that's not what we have currently from most of our mainstream media, who have clearly chosen sides, both left and right. Search out alternative voices. And support those who report the truth despite being harassed by governments. Personally, I read https://www.thegatewaypundit.com for politics, plus watch Fox News, NewsMax, and other conservative media, although I don't agree with some of what they say. When I was younger I was far more liberal, but then the issues changed and so did I. Experience is a great teacher, and every age has something new to offer. 
 

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VOTING is the linchpin of democracy, and democracy demands transparency, not trust. Voting must be transparent so that election observers have something to observe in order to protect against election fraud. Which means that we need the following: hand counted paper ballots at local polls on Election Day only, and under the watchful eyes of election observers;  NOT machines, computers, e-mail voting, absentee voting, mail-in voting, drop boxes, ballot harvesting, late counting, etc..  The only exception would be voting at embassies and military bases. 

PUBLIC POLLS: We need the government to conduct 'public polls' BEFORE legislation is passed. Our political leaders can't represent the 'will of the people' if they don't know what it is, in any meaningful manner. Private political polls, like our current election system, are nontransparent and untrustworthy. Think about it. We're using anonymous political polls to predict and verify anonymous voting results. It's completely nonsensical! 

'OPEN' VOTING & POLLING:  I suggest that we ditch the "secret ballot" and conduct "open voting" for all polling, elections, and legislation, so that everyone knows how everyone voted. It would all be part of the public record. The secret 'anonymous' ballot is the single biggest reason that we can't truly audit any election. It began to be used after the Civil War, to 'protect' voters from intimidation. Before then, how people voted was public knowledge. What the secret ballot did was to open the doors wide to undetectable vote fraud and unverifiable election results. Likewise, "exit polls" were first introduced in 1964 by the major news networks who at the same time introduced computer ballot-counting machines. A coincidence? I think not. Although not a frequent topic of public discussion, is the fundamental concern that the promotion of 'secrecy' as 'voter protection' has encouraged a kind of cowardice among the electorate, where few people are encouraged to engage is civil discourse, speak their minds, test their political positions, or stand up for what they believe it.  I've written about voting in detail at ProtocolsForDemocracy.org

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY + DIRECT DEMOCRACY: As well as vote for our political leaders, citizens should have the opportunity to vote directly on specific issues and legislation locally, statewide, and nationally. Most people support a representative democracy, but many of our leaders don't do what they said they were going to do once they get into office. One way around that problem is to vote on legislation directly, over-riding our legislators, when necessary. It's called Direct Democracy.  Of course, as with everything in life, it has its pros and cons, but it could be an effective solution to tyrannical behavior by government officials.

TIME TO END LAST MINUTE 'OMNIBUS' BILLS: Both the public and our political representatives must have the time to read, understand, and react to the matters on which our representatives will vote. And each bill should stand on its own, rather than omnibus bills that are packed with too many unrelated issues, lumping good bills in with bad ones. 

PROTOCOLS FOR POLITICAL CANDIDATES:  We've got to take the money completely out of the election process, particularly foreign money. However, due to the Citizen's United decision etc., it will take an Act of Congress to fix it.  Ideally, before any election, the government should pay for and require: 1) 3 televised debates for candidates (the last one being a week before the election), 2) 3 televised press conferences when candidates must answer reporters questions, 3) provide candidates a free campaign website to fill with their own content, and 4) mail out a list of questions with the candidates' replies, so that voters can know where the candidates stand on the issues. These protocols can help guard against electing to office candidates who may be physically, mentally, or emotionally unfit for office.

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POLITICAL PARTIES: In many ways, the political parties are designed to divide us into teams and distract us from the issues we care about, rather than work together to solve society's problems. Rampant distrust of the political parties explains why approximately 40% of voters are registered "unaffiliated". However, in many cases you need to join a party for practical purposes.  No matter which party you belong to, or not, it's best to focus on issues and their solutions. Find common ground and move forward.

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ADDITIONAL ISSUES:

• All wars should require a vote of Congress, per our U.S. Constitution
• "Executive Orders" and "Emergency Powers" should be minimized, and "The US Patriot Act" revoked, as they put the "mock" in Democracy and undercut the role of the legislature. 
• Government should NEVER be allowed to 'protect from liability' any entity from civil or criminal lawsuits, as has happened with vaccine makers, as it denies citizens their right to the third branch of government, the Judiciary.
• End the conflicts of interest for elected representatives and civil servants, who should be required to divest from all Wall Street and similar investments.

With our Bill of Rights come responsibilities - that we have to fight for every single day.

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RACISM & THE REVERSE

"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character." Martin Luther King

FAIRNESS?  Meritocracy & Equal Opportunity versus Quotas & Equity of Outcomes: We should promote people based on merit, not race, sex, ethnicity, religion, nor personal connections. If it's good enough for the NBA, NFL, and various other sports and occupations where African American do very well, if not dominate, then it's good enough for every other profession.  Otherwise, preferential treatment sows discontent and frustration within every part of society; it poisons the well.  People will always doubt someone's ability to do a job properly, if they got preferential treatment. Besides, not everyone needs to play for the NBA, however they can play for other organizations and on city teams.  Not everyone needs to go to Harvard Medical School; there are other medical schools that are less competitive, less expensive, and perhaps even more competent. And most of all, people can set up their own private organizations and businesses that can cater to their specific needs.
 

SOLUTIONS?  Good Intentions & Bad Consequences:  Sometimes with the best of intentions, we can really screw things up. For instance, school bussing was meant to integrate the school system, but instead, whites left the cities in droves and fled to the suburbs, making segregation worse.  Effective educational reforms and enforcing laws against discriminatory housing practices would have been a better way to go. In a similar manner, social welfare programs were meant to support poor mothers and their children; instead these programs encouraged many fathers to abandon their families, leaving mothers and children more destitute than ever. Incentives for intact families, as well as workfare, are better solutions. Another example, many individuals and churches are creating problems for their local neighbors by feeding the homeless and drug addicts, instead of taking them to government social services and getting them effective care and treatment. So, the next time you try to help someone, think it through and try to be sure that you are making things better for everyone, not worse. Good intentions can have some pretty bad, though unintentional, consequences
 

SETTLING THE SCORE?  Past Injustices & Reparations: This is a tough one. Certainly, neither people, businesses, nor institutions should get away with doing bad things to others, and then benefitting from it. After the Civil War, African Americans were supposed to be compensated, but most never were. And now all those former slaves and slave masters are long gone, although some of the descendents of slave owners, are still living on their plantations, which seems weird.  But, what about Indigenous Americans, other ethnic groups, and women who have been denied just compensation for past injustices for centuries?  How to make up for the sins of the past? I don't think whole-sale reparations is the answer.  Banks, art museums, and others unjustly held onto stolen Jewish property after World War II for decades, until a few brave souls stepped forward to right that wrong. And they succeeded to a limited degree. See: https://jcpa.org Frankly, I don't have a good answer to this issue.
 

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SEXUAL ORIENTATION & CONFUSION: LGBTQ+?

Most people take a "live and let live" approach to members of the LGBTQ+? community.  And that's how it should be.  LGBTQ+? folks should have the same rights as everyone else, but not more rights. It can be a very tricky subject. So much so, that schools should have no role in counseling students about sexual orientation without the express permission of the individual parents involved.  Many parents do not want LGBTQ+ held up as a lifestyle for their children to aspire to, unless their child's natural instincts are already headed in that direction. Complicating the picture even more, some children are born with both sexual organs - hermaphrodites, which can create a serious dilemma.

Regarding the "transgender rights" issue - to claim the rights of the opposite sex - a person's sex at birth should be the determining factor, particularly as it pertains to government contracts, regulations, IDs, and access to single-sex bathrooms, showers, prisons, colleges, sororities, prisons, and particularly sports. Girls & women's sports, under proposed changes to Title 9 and other sports organizations' rules, are systematically destroyed when transgender athletes (males) are allowed to join in girls & women's competitions, often threatening the safety of females due to males larger and stronger physical size.  It's so blatantly unfair that it defies all common sense. More worrisome is medical advice that convinces children and parents that surgery and lifetime medications are the only answers to gender confusion, when both the physical and emotional side effects can be devastating.

As far as pronouns are concerned, it is confusing, frustrating, and dividing the public unnecessarily. Who is going to remember everyone's "personal pronoun" anyway? I can't remember my own middle name. Wear a name tag if this issue is that important to you.  Or dress in a manner that suggests how you want to be addressed. After all, that's why people wear wedding rings.

But, there is a bigger issue involved that rarely gets much publicity. Why are so many children today being born sexually confused, both physically and mentally?  Many scientists point to excess exposure to estrogen, a female hormone, found in foods like soy & dairy, contraception pills, fertilizers, pesticides, fossil, fuels, etc., as well as other medications and vaccines, all of which may contribute to the disruption of human sexual development and mutation of DNA. This has been observed in wild animals for decades, and most of it is attributed to pollution. So, it stands to reason that human sexual development is being adversely affected, as well. It's an issue that needs to be addressed for the future of humanity could be at stake. Here's an old article of mine on this subject - http://www.thelandesreport.com/EstrogenOverload.htm

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EDUCATION

The fight for a great public education is everyone's fight for our future.

We each need to build our own curriculum that will ensure that our children are being properly educated at home and at school. Ideally, the federal government should provide free online educational material and testing for all grade levels, including college and post graduate courses, as well as free online job training material. States can decide their own curriculums, but it would be helpful for the federal government to supply a base of support or alternative.

I strongly believe in a public school education because these children are our future.  When our best and brightest opt out of local public schools for private options, everyone loses.  Everyone disconnects from each other's reality.  And those parents and students who would be the most pro-active and successful advocates for a good education, leave behind students and their parents who really need their leadership. It creates a learning ghetto for the poor and unlucky, who will naturally be resentful as they get older. Parents can run, but the public can't hide from the results of a poor public school education.

That said, I don't believe that we can or should outlaw private options. People have a right to choose, however, private school & charter parents do not have the same right to complain about their children's education as do local public school parents. If private & charter school parents do complain, they risk their children's removal from school, with no legal recourse.  Regarding home schooling, in my opinion it is just too isolating in general, although it can be appropriate in certain circumstances.

So, how to make any school great?  We need to check out the curriculum, plus review their text books and work papers.  Clearly, something has gone terribly wrong in that so many students are failing to learn. 1) Set specific goals for the students to meet, 2) Have a teacher and an aid in every classroom, and invite the parents and volunteers into the classroom to observe and assist the teachers. 3) Balance students' education evenly between knowledge and skills, from primitive to high tech.  4) Provide course materials  "free" online and for download for the benefit of both students, parents, and the public; and for every grade level (K to PHD) and on every subject and skill. (It would be great if the federal and/or state governments would provide this information without slipping in any crazy agendas.) 5) Have lots of volunteer hallway monitors trained to keep the peace, 6) Transfer disruptive students to special schools where their needs can be properly addressed, 7) Make sure the classrooms have big windows that let the light in, 8) Let students outside for at least 30 minutes every day, 9) Give all kids free meals that are nutritious, and 10) Fill the school with uplifting and inspiring art, music, literature, etc..

The "knowledge half" of the curriculum should include critical thinking (i.e., making sense), manners and morals, philosophy, religion, politics, science, math, grammar, history, etc..   The "skills half" should span the range of primitive skills to high technology, as well as life skill such as how to apply for a job or school, write a check, budget your money, get a job, start a business, maintain a car and house, etc..  In particular, students should know all about our wild world and its uses, as well as how to make their own food, clothing, shelter, furniture, etc..  And last but not least, skills should include sports and dance (particularly line dances)! 

People need to work with their "hands and minds together" in order to really learn about life. They need to experience things first hand, not just read about them in books. However, most schools don't do that. And, too much of what they teach has no practical application. Students need to get outside of the schools to visit town hall meetings, factories, farms, laboratories, and offices, not just go to museums and play parks.  And there needs to be robust "work study" programs for students. In addition, every school should have a school store with items for sale that the students made themselves.

We can change our children's education for the better. Go to school board meetings and lobby for a balanced curriculum between knowledge and skills. And that means skills training for all students, not just the vocational kids.  Grandparents and non-parents should also attend school board meetings because many parents are afraid to do it because of the real threat of backlash on their children...which does happen. But that's life. We all have a civic duty to do what's right for our children and their future.  It really does take a village to raise a child.

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WE NEED BEAUTIFUL CITIES, HIGHWAYS, & BYWAYS:

Whatever we build should be beautiful... something that lifts our spirits and fills our souls, as opposed to the Brutal Architecture movement. Zoning boards should make attractiveness a priority.

• STREET & SIDEWALK CONSTRUCTION - PAVERS, NOT PAVEMENT!  For most streets and sidewalks, it's a better idea to use pavers that can be installed and removed as needed, rather than use asphalt which is not porous, ends up looking like a patchwork quilt punctuated with potholes, and it's toxic to boot!  What's not to like? See my website: SmallStreetsPhilly.org
   

• HIGHWAY TOLLS: Tolls are a bad idea, an unfair tax that disproportionately affects the poor, and also cause traffic jams which adds to air pollution. Everyone profits from state and federal highways, so everyone should pay for them through their taxes.
   

• HIGHWAY WALLS:  Tear down those walls along our highways.  They are ugly and unsafe. In case of a fiery pileup on the highway, those walls will prevent people from escaping. Also, stop building houses and businesses right next to highways; that air and noise can't be healthy. To stop the road traffic sound, plant lots of trees and bushes - https://greenupside.com/what-plants-make-a-good-sound-barrier-noise-cancelling-plants
   

• BRIDGES WITH A VIEW:  Too often we can't see the view from a bridge. We should be able to see the creeks and rivers that we're traveling over! It's a beautiful sight we need to enjoy.
   

• HIGHWAY LANDSCAPING & LITTER:  There's no excuse for litter along the highways. Our highways should be clean and beautiful! It's a good job for those who need to do 'community service'. We've had a few family members engaged in that program.

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LOVE & SEX

Treat both love and sex very thoughtfully and respectfully. And try not to confuse having a crush on someone with true love. And, just because you love someone, does not mean that you should have sex with them, particularly if you are both young.  Sex is serious business and should be saved for serious monogamous relationships. There's nothing free about "free sex", contrary to what others and much of the entertainment industry may have to say on the subject. As a practical matter, sex can result in pregnancy, which is great if you're trying to have children and ready to raise them properly.  What is less well know, however, is that sex can also result in sterility, as the result of a sexually transmitted diseases (STD), such as Chlamydia. Which is why it is not a good idea to lead a 'fast and loose' lifestyle, aka "Sex In The City". And very importantly, if you don't drink or do drugs, then you'll be much less likely to lose control of your emotions and your self-respect. As with everything in life, what you do has consequences for everyone. Use your head and your heart. Let love respectfully lead the way.

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MARRIAGE & DIVORCE

Marry someone you like, as well as love, someone you feel comfortable with, someone who will be wise and work hard; someone you can discuss all sorts of subjects with and have a laugh, and someone you can count on...most of the time.  It's important to understand that people are not perfect and most marriages will face many difficult crises. Be forgiving of your partner and yourself.  If you have children, you want to set an example for them of how parents work together cooperatively and how to disagree without being disagreeable.  And even when some shouting may be going on, show how you both get over your disagreements and don't harbor grudges. Disagreements happen for a reason. Take those disagreements and turn them into opportunities to make things better between the two of you.

However, if things get really miserable, and you think you want to get a divorce, think long and hard about it.  Make sure that it isn't the 4-year-rut or 7-year-itch or 20-year-trench or whatever.  Marriages can get boring and stagnant, where both partners may be tempted to cheat (or in fact do cheat), but that doesn't mean that the marriage is doomed. It happens in many marriages. Don't panic. It might mean that you need couples therapy, or need to make a significant change in your life, such as moving to a new location, getting a different job, making new friends, staying home with the kids, or having kids!

Just know that divorce, especially when kids are involved, can be very traumatic for all involved, and that trauma can last a lifetime. If it's joint custody, understand that you just cut in half the time you may have with your children, doubled your expenses, plus will need to have two sets of everything for the children for each parent's house. Things may get much more chaotic on every front. So, don't go into divorce thinking that "everyone does it" and that it's part of being a "modern family".  It can be pure hell for everyone involved.  And don't kid yourself that kids are resilient. Some are and some aren't.  Make sure that divorce is unavoidable and that there's no alternative, before you decide to go through with it.  And lastly, don't be too proud to admit if you made a mistake. Divorced couples do sometimes reconcile (10-15%).

If you do get divorced, then make it the most positive experience possible for all concerned. If kids are involved, try to live close to your former spouse, and not to separate the kids from either parent for more than 3 nights at a time, at least when they are young - recognizing that every divorce has its own complexities and solutions.  Also, don't criticize your former spouse unnecessarily in front of the kids. There may be times that it is necessary, but otherwise, the kids don't need that negative energy. Be honest with your kids that both you and your ex have your strengths and weaknesses. Hopefully, over time, you will both find more compatible partners and everyone will benefit.

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FAMILY PLANNING

The life of a baby begins at conception. That's just a scientific fact.  And I believe that we all have a soul which is eternal, including the unborn. So, to end a child's life without just cause (i.e., to save the life of the mother, etc.) is wrong.  That said, many women want the legal right to make that choice, anyway. In some states, women can choose up to and beyond the hour of birth without having to show cause.  In my book, that's murder. On the other hand, many states and countries allow abortions in the first trimester.  It's still wrong, but at this moment in history, it might be the best option. I realize that appalls many pro-life activists, but think of it this way.  Our Founders wrote the Declaration of Independence knowing full well that African Americans, women, and many others were not treated equally at the time, nor even in the near future.  But they stated their intention and eventually it became a reality.

In a similar manner, I believe that abortion will be a thing of the past, eventually, because people will be more aware of healthy methods to plan their families. But, that is not the case today. "The pill" and other contraceptive devices can be very damaging to women's health and their babies.  And that fact should be the pro-life movements' focus - natural and safe solutions to family planning.  Herbal remedies offer a lot of possibilities, but I'm not an expert on this subject. Here's a couple of websites I found, but I can't say what works well and what doesn't. My main point is that we all should be working toward healthy solutions to family planning.

• https://www.healthline.com/health/birth-control/history-of-birth-control#early-history

• https://www.olwomen.com/files/herbs-that-act-as-natural-birth-control

• https://www.homeremediescare.com/25-herbal-home-remedies-for-birth-control-avoid-pregnancy-naturally

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FAMILY BUILDING & ADOPTION

Society should encourage family building through adoption, no matter what the age. Families provide stability and security.  And the government should take an active role in helping those who want a family to have one. I'm not just referring to the adoption of little children, which my husband and I did, but also making room for teenagers and grown adults. There are seniors who may not have any children or grandchildren, but want them, and vice versa.  For those who adopt teenagers and adults, you will also need to adopt a forgiving attitude that will make the situation workable and enjoyable. Nothing is perfect in life, but loneliness can be devastating. Building a family is a much better bet. The government should provide a registry and host events to bring people together who are looking to begin or expand their family. If government won't do it, then neighborhood civic organizations should. We are so happy that we adopted our three children, who are now adults with children of their own. Raising children and being part of a family is not always easy, but it's always worth it, as the universe does not want us to go through life alone and lonely.  https://adopting.org/adult-adoption

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PARENTING

Raising a child is the hardest thing you'll ever do, and the most rewarding.  Just be sure that you really want children before you become a parent. Because once you have a child, they will take over your life and you may not get a good night's sleep until they're are out of the house, and lots of times, not even then. In other words, children are a lifetime commitment. Parents lead by example, for good or ill.  Behave in a respectful way in every facet of your life, and you'll reap the rewards of setting a good example for your children. On the other hand, if you dress like a slob and act like an idiot, then your children will learn from that as well. 

Of course, most parents love their children, but they must also make demands of them.  Children should be contributing members of the family, which means that they keep their rooms clean and tidy, comb their hair, brush their teeth, help with the housework, do their schoolwork, and give back to the community.  Plus, children should learn all kinds of skills from their parents, particularly if their schools fall short on that score.  You want to prepare your kids for the real world.

Do your best as a parent, but know that you can't control the outcome as children become adults. You can take a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.  As a parent, keep listening patiently, advising wisely, and assisting your children when appropriate.  And, just remember, that as you take care of them when they are young (and perhaps even take care of their children as a grandparent), conversely, you may need your adult children to take care of you when you get old! So, be generous to your children with your time, attention, and love. What goes around, often comes around, in spades.

Single Parents - Children really need both male and female role models. But, if a traditional family is not possible, then ask a family member or friend to serve as an "aunt" or "uncle", to be a fixture and role model in your children's lives.

Stay-at-home moms or dads - It's a great privilege to stay at home and raise your own children, but it's also an opportunity to engage in a wide variety of interests and concerns.  Since "working moms" became common in the 1970's, many of those moms have become completely frazzled, believing that they could "have it all". Meanwhile, their children spend too much time with babysitters, in daycare, or alone; while schools, community groups, and advocacy organizations have lost millions of dedicated volunteers and activists.  I'm so grateful that I chose to stay at home and be there for my children and grandchildren, as well as become a community activist, freelance journalist, and many other things. I understand that many moms and dads don't have that choice, yet many do, but are still under immense pressure to "make money".   Staying home was, for me, "being free" to do what I really wanted to do, as a mother and a member of society. That said, staying at home is definitely not for everyone. So, give this decision careful consideration and then do what's best for you and your children.

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THE GOLDEN YEARS

Age gracefully. Embrace your senior years, and please don't try to look or act younger! It rarely works. As a senior citizen myself (born in 1952), I’m enjoying growing older.  Maybe I’ve been lucky, but I also take care of myself, eat healthy food, avoid all drugs (legal and otherwise), and engage in moderate exercise…mostly “mindful” walking, so that I don’t trip on the sidewalk and fall on my face…which I’ve done. I avoid doctors, unless it’s an emergency and “wellness checks”, for two reasons: 1) Those check-ups often do more harm than good, and 2) I'd be worrying all the time, dreading what dastardly illness might be lurking in my body undetected. The endless stress would be unbearable, if not unhealthy.  So, unless I have a good reason to go to the doctor, I don’t.

Stay busy. I’ve always been very busy as a stay-at-home mother of 3 (now grandmother of 5), community organizer, issue activist, free-lance journalist, etc.. (visit LynnLandes.com).  My husband is the same way, and so is his brother (born in 1942 and 40 respectively). They are never bored and stay really busy. It’s an important skill to hone… how to plan your life and use your time wisely. I feel sorry for people who are bored because it is clear that they are not reaching out, or don’t know how to. But, it’s never too late, particularly if you decide to help others, or "save the planet", or join a knitting/crochet group. There are lots of organizations dedicated to doing those things, or you can start your own.  Meetup.com makes that pretty easy.
 

Live with others. Make sure that you have friends that you can buddy up with. As far as families are concerned, in some cultures it's expected that the older relatives live with the younger, so that the older folks help take care of the younger children. And that's what we do, except we don't live with our daughter and her kids, but we're very close and do help out almost daily, and we love it!  We're about an hour away from our son and his kids, so we're not with them as much, but thankfully they've got a fully engaged grandma and extended family. Many grandparents are moving to be near their children so as to not miss out on their grandchildren's lives, as well as to have their loved ones nearby for their senior years, which makes sense.  But, the tough question is this - What do we do if we find ourselves in the position of not being able to live on our own? Personally for us, it would be either an "assisted living" facility (expensive), or maybe a large house (with an elevator) with other seniors (and visiting nurses), close to a downtown area with parks and stuff that we could get to in electric wheelchairs, which could be fun and hopefully more affordable. That said, my husband and I aren't at that decision point, yet. Stay tuned.

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